The Luckiest Charm of All
Good morning, lower-than-average balanced individuals.
Today I would like to share with you my thoughts on a subject that is very critical in my life as it should be in every life:
Which of the charms in Lucky Charms cereal is the luckiest?
The question seems to come so naturally to us. Who would not want to know the answer? Well, everyone, that question is entirely rhetorical; no one would not want to know which charm is the luckiest. It is science, my friends. Those who would disagree and say that they or others would rather not know which charm matters most for any number of reasons is a liar and a fool.
So, then, which is it?
I will start by saying that it is not the leprechaun hat, nor the horseshoe, the hot air balloon, or the moon. Four down. No explanation necessary. If anyone asks me to explain this, I (and most likely the rest of the world) will assume that they are of extremely low intelligence and lacking in well-arranged priorities.
Now, the remaining candidates:
1. the Heart
2. the Rainbow
3. the Shooting Star
4. the Hour Glass
Before we bring this to a close with the winner of “Luckiest Charm ‘09”, there is one additional question to ask; what makes each of these charms lucky? You see, the truth is that while some charms ARE lucky, other charms simply make one FEEL lucky that they have come into possession of them.
For instance, someone lacking a heart would most likely feel lucky to find a heart. Finally, this person is able to love and be loved; congratulations. That being said, in essence, there is really nothing lucky about a heart; hearts were not intended for “luck”. With that, unfortunately (no pun intended), I will eliminate the heart charm. Keeping the same logic in mind, we will have to rule out the hour glass. This saddens me. The hour glass is by far the coolest of all of the charms (and also happens to be the newest and most likely most temporary addition to the charm family) since it enables one to travel back and forward in time. Oh well.
This leaves us with the rainbow and the shooting star; two classically “lucky” items. The rainbow is considered lucky and leads the person blessed enough to stumble upon it to a pot of gold (exact value not established). Additionally, rainbows are also pretty. The shooting star: extremely cool and lucky. The shooting star not only makes someone FEEL lucky but IS considerably high on the luck scale. The shooting star is also very pretty.
Since I am running very low on time right now and must get ready to leave for work, I will now expose the winning charm.
CONGRATULATIONS, SHOOTING STAR.
You are very lucky and very awesome. Rainbow did not win because it lacks the personality that you so wonderously display. It also cannot fly.
Sorry, out of time. I hope that this was helpful for everyone. I know it was.
LOVE,
Gwendolyn
